Qualities of a good son or daughter
Both sons and daughter are a blessing for the parents. It is a fact that the strongest and the most sincere love exists in the relation of the parents and their children.
No child is born good or bad, it is the qualities he adopts with the passage of time that make him stand good or bad. A good son or a good daughter would be obedient to his parents. It is a religious obligation, a social norm and an indication of refined behaviors and a peaceful family set up for the children to be obedient to their parents.
Such a son or daughter would be dutiful. He would know his duties as regards his parents and would always try to fulfill those in time. In the age when a son or daughter can earn; they would earn and instead of taking money from their parents they will try to give them money. This will make them feel proud and think that they are getting back for what they had spent on their children.
Not only this good son or a good daughter would be caring towards his/her parents. It is a fact that as children grow to their youth, parents start their journey of old age. And in the old age they demand as much care and attention as children need when they are very young. It is obligatory for the children to remain caring, dutiful and pleasant to their parents and make them feel as part of family. It is often seen that children start feeling that their parents in the old age are no more than a burden. This is a very wrong attitude and in my religion this is strongly condemned. Instead it is advised that when in the old age, parents should be taken care of by the children as children were taken care of in their early age.
A good son or daughter would look after all the needs of his / her parents. And by no action of his/her will make them feel as if he/she are fed up of them. Also they will be respectful to their parents and would always give thought to their suggestions and would always try to act upon those. Since the advices given by the parents are the result of their experiences which children in their arrogance often ignore. They should think that there is no alternate to the experience and parents would never give a bad opinion to their children.
It is a pity that with the passage of time the children don’t give the parents their due rights nor do they look after them in the right manner. This situation has resulted in the formation of many old houses where old parents are trying to pass the remaining days of their lives. they can not enjoys the joys of their children because their children don’t want to keep them with because of their busy schedules.
Islam lays a great importance on the respect of parents. Islam says that Heaven lies under the feet of one’s mother. Likewise there is a great status of father in ISlam too and one is asked to act upon the advices of their parents always unless they order him to change his religion.
In our culture too, we see that with the passage of time the children have developed the habits of not obeying their parents. This has with the passage of time played a vital role in weakening the family bonds.
The unit of any society is a home in the very basic perspective. When the basics would not be strong how can the building be strong which is developed on those basics. This is the very same situation in modern societies, the family bonds are not that strong as they used to be resulting in the weakness in the society as a whole and a frustrated youth which cannot play its part productively towards national growth.
It is commonly known that parents expect to see their children behaving decently and respectfully. It is extremely important for parents to provide to their kids a clear explanation of what is bad and what is good. Hence, by having parents’ support and advices, children could achieve the important qualities that later their parents could be proud of. In my opinion, the basic qualities of a being a good son or daughter have been remaining the same over years.
The most important quality, I think, is that we should respect our parents. It was our parents who brought us into the world and brought us up. They provided us food and clothes, and send us to schools to be educated. They tried their bests to make our life happy and comfortable. Accordingly, it was our responsibility to respect our parents, including their efforts and opinions. We should not spend too much money on useless items because the money comes from parents’ hard work. At the same time, we must listen to the right advices from parents and don’t act according to our own wishes and desires despite the objection of our parents.
The second quality for a good son or daughter is that we should take care for our parents when they become old. Nowadays we have already attended the university, usually far away from parents. So we should keep in touch with them by telephone, letter and e-mail, not making them feel lonely. We may talk about their life at home, such as their work and their health. In fact every time when I give a call to my parents, I may feel that the call bring them happiness. The reason is that not only can they know that I am doing well, but also they know that their son cares about his parents.
A good son or daughter should have many merits. From my point of view, respecting the parents and caring for them are the most important for everyone. What’s more, these values cannot be changed with the development of the society because they are the fundamental qualities of a good son or daughter.
In Chinese culture, a person who is filial and obedient to his parents is regarded as a good son. Confucianism, an ideology that had great effect on the Chinese society, stresses the importance of harmonious interpersonal relations between family members, particularly that between parents and children. Judgment on a man is often based on his attitude toward his parents.
Confucian classics contain many principles regarding the
“right” conducts people should have to handle the rela tion with their parents. For instance, people in the past were required to pay respects to their parents everyday in the morning. Children should follow whatever orders or instructions their parents issued. A person who was most respectful to his parents was highly praised and often set up as a model in the society.
The ancient Chinese thought that there was a connection between the relations within the family and political institutions of the country. They extended the formula of administering a family to social and political affairs. In other words, the Chinese people ran the country on the principles based on family life. The emperor was respected by his subjects as a father was by his children. An official faithful to his lord was often compared to a son filial to his father.
However, China has undergone great changes over the past century. Influenced by western thoughts, the Chinese people have revised and transformed many traditional ideologies and ways of thinking. Parents have no longer had absolute authority over their children. Now young people may stand on an equal relation with their parents and they stress more personal freedom and independence. But the traditional ideology remains to be very influential, a good son who is respectful to and takes cares of his parents is considered by others as one of high moral character.